I enjoyed reading about Jonathan Metzl’s new book, “Dying of Whiteness,” but he seems to have missed the point as to why those people who are “dying of whiteness” have decided to take that self-destructive path in their personal lives.
The answer could be found in the fact that many or most of them have low self-esteem. Take Trevor, for example, who Jonathan interviewed. I would be willing to bet that Trevor came from a home environment where there was very little love and nurturing. That is, he had low self-esteem.
People with low feelings of self-worth generally exhibit the following characteristics:
- They blame others for their problems and see themselves as victims.
- They are quick to anger and often the anger is misdirected.
- They are ill much of the time because they often have impaired immune systems.
- They have little compassion for the plight of others.
- They make very little eye contact, and break eye contact when discussing an issue they have yet to resolve.
- They often tell half-truths or whole lies.
- They tend to be negative and often complain (racial resentment).
One of the things that negatively affects our feelings of self-worth is when we withhold our feelings and emotions. Withholding is a form of lying that demeans us and lowers our self-esteem. As our self-esteem is lowered, we take fewer risks in interpersonal relationships and create baggage for ourselves that affects our ability to focus and process information.
Marvin Fremerman
Springfield, Missouri
Fremerman is the author of “The Dynamics of High Self-Esteem. A Guide to Personal and Professional Growth,” and “Mind Over Sports. The relationship of self-esteem to athletic performance.”
