Archived Opinion

Some time ago I was talking with a dear friend, also a Reform Jew, who wanted to be a cantor. I asked them why they didn’t take the leap and apply to the Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion (HUC-JIR), our movement’s most well-known institution for Jewish higher education, to pursue their passion. They explained their personal life made that option impossible; a Jew whose life-partner is not Jewish is not welcome at the seminary.

I was astounded and appalled! How is that possible in our modern day Reform movement?

I looked up HUC-JIR’s admissions policy online, and, yes, in fact, it does discriminate in this very specific way:  

“We celebrate the contribution of people of all faiths toward building and sustaining loving Jewish homes, and yet we believe that rabbis, cantors and educators should exemplify a distinct standard of Jewish continuity. Therefore, HUC-JIR will only admit, graduate or ordain candidates who, if in a committed long-term relationship, are in such a relationship with a Jewish partner.” 

This policy is dismaying and counter-productive for many reasons:

1. My understanding of Jewish history, belief and tradition is that our Jewish leaders are no different than the rest of us. They may be trained as teachers and specialists to lead worship and to lead congregations, but modern-day rabbis and cantors are not the priests of old; they hold no special place in the eyes of God. So what does it mean to be held to “a distinct standard of Jewish continuity?”

Clearly, that is code for making Jewish children and raising them in a Jewish home. Yet the HUC-JIR admits candidates — both single and coupled, both gay and straight — who do not intend to bear, adopt or otherwise raise children. HUC-JIR admits women candidates past the age of child-bearing. HUC-JIR admits candidates who intend to limit the size of their families. HUC-JIR admits candidates who are infertile.

If the concern is “Jewish continuity,” why are candidates committed to life partners who are not Jewish — including those who plan to raise Jewish children in a Jewish home — seen as the only detractors?

2. The future of our people, as the HUC-JIR readily admits, depends on the contributions and the goodwill of interfaith couples — many of whom are raising Jewish children in Jewish homes. Many of the families in my synagogue have one partner who is not Jewish. Last year our son married a woman who is not Jewish — under a chuppah, with a ketubah, officiated by a rabbi ordained by the Jewish Theological Seminary. They are building a Jewish home with much greater care and intention than many couples where both were born Jewish or where one or both formally converted to our religion.  

What signal does it send to interfaith families to tell them there is a higher standard of Judaism — which they do not meet? How does that help keep them included, so that more families remain engaged in congregational life and more children are raised and educated as Jews? One could argue that the seminary’s policy of exclusion harms Jewish continuity rather than promoting it.

3. As an independent professional woman, I am offended that my partner’s faith, behavior, education or any other characteristic could ever limit my own educational or career options. Imagine the outrage today if a company had a policy of only hiring or promoting men with stay-at-home wives, once standard practice in a corporate culture now seen as anachronistic and patriarchal.

In the same way, the time is long past when a congregation hired a male rabbi (or cantor) and got a second staff person “for free” in the form of his willing, available wife. If a person is fully able to fulfill the duties, responsibilities and commitments of the position of rabbi or cantor, what does it matter the faith of their partner? A congregation is hiring one — not both.  

4. We are walking away from talent. My friend would have made an amazing cantor. And yet, because of this arcane and bigoted policy, they cannot study at the HUC-JIR to become one. This policy deprives them of the opportunity for career development within the Jewish faith, and it deprives the Jewish community of a much-needed cantor.

I did not previously know about this obsolete and offensive policy of exclusion. I bet a lot of Reform Jews don’t know either and would be upset if they did. Our community of modern, Reform Jews needs to call upon the HUC-JIR to change their policy to reflect our movement’s values of inclusivity, fairness and individual autonomy.

Martha Gershun is a retired nonprofit executive.  She is a member of Congregation Beth Torah, where she serves on the Liturgical Committee and leads worship as a lay volunteer.

“Heretics” by Leonardo Padura, Farrar, 

Strauss and Giroux, 2017, 528 pages, 

$16.15 Amazon paperback

Leonardo Padura is a well-known Cuban author whose mysteries featuring Cuban police detective Mario Conde have been very popular. In fact, he is also the author of historical fiction of note including “The Man Who Loved Dogs,” a novel about the assassination of Leon Trotsky, and “Adios Hemingway” about the author’s life in Cuba.

In “Heretics” Padura combines crimes that the now-retired Conde must solve, with an exploration of Jewish life in Cuba before Batista took over and stories reaching far into the past from Amsterdam to Poland in the 1600’s.

The novel begins with 9-year-old Daniel Kaminsky standing on the dock in Havana as the SS Saint Louis comes into the harbor carrying hundreds of Jews who are fleeing Hitler. Daniel’s parents are on board, carrying with them a small Rembrandt portrait that has been in their family for about 300 years. The Kaminskys hope to use it to bargain for their freedom, but they fail. Like the other passengers on board, they are sent back to Europe and end up murdered in a concentration camp.

That however, is only the beginning of the novel. How did the Rembrandt become a possession of the Kaminsky family? Who is the boy in the portrait? Where did the painting go when the Kaminskys were denied entry to Cuba? What happens to Daniel? All of these questions are eventually answered.

Padura shifts the narrative to Amsterdam in the 1600s where Jews from Catholic countries found a safe haven from the Inquisition. He introduces the excommunication of Baruch Spinoza and the emergence of Shabtai Tzvi who claimed to be the new Messiah. Finally he returns his story to modern day Cuba when the mysterious painting is found in auction in England. Then Daniel’s grandson decides to recover it for the family.

“Heretics” is a complicated narrative that explores Jewish history for three centuries. It is beautifully written, combining mysteries, Jewish history and characters a reader will care about. Yes, it is over 500 pages long, but so is any recounting of Jewish history.

Andrea Kempf is a retired librarian and an award winning book reviewer.

I wish someone would ask Congresswoman Ilhan Omar what position she would take concerning Palestine if it was to become a widely recognized nation among nations. What makes this question apt is her support for Palestine and her tweet earlier this year concerning support for Israel in the U.S. Congress saying “I should not be expected to have allegiance/pledge support to a foreign country...”

An interesting perspective comes from journalist Jonathan Chait who wrote in New York Magazine “to believe in a strong American alliance with Israel (or Canada, or the United Kingdom, or any other country) is not the same thing as giving one’s allegiance to that country.”

I say respectfully, viva the difference.

Barry Speert

Overland Park, Kansas

I recently sent the following letter to Sen. Mitch McConnell:

I am one of thousands of Americans, Republican, Democrat, Independent, who are urgently asking you to reconsider now, and agree to bring all the measures previously passed by the House of Representatives, which relate to gun control, to the Senate floor.

It’s clear, Sen. McConnell, that the overwhelming majority of Americans agree that the time is NOW to make the necessary changes to our gun laws.

If you do this, you will be the world-recognized hero to millions of U.S. citizens, who are desperately asking Congress to accomplish something on gun legislation. Persons will now look upon you as a hero from Kentucky, not as the obstinate piece of granite that you are now viewed.

You don’t need the approval of the NRA! You can win re-election on your own. It’s okay to thumb your nose at them, especially with the news lately of their infighting and unlawful attempts for personal gain by their leaders.

Please answer this directly to me. I am an 89-year-old independent voter here in Johnson County, Kansas, who like you, seeks improvement in our government and our laws.

Thank you in advance for your service to your country and to the Senate. I look forward to your response.

M. J. Rosenbloom

Prairie Village, Kansas

Blanche Sosland wrote “Banishing Bullying Behavior: A Call to Action from Early Childhood through Senior Adulthood” for the general public and it truly is a “call to action” for all of us to help stop the growing epidemic of bullying in schools, the workplace, senior living environments and cyber-bullying.

Sosland has also co-authored two other books on bullying, with SuEllen Fried, that were more in the textbook genre.

“I feel very strongly about the subject because I see the pain that it inflicts across the board,” she said. “It’s just something that should not be and there are ways to intervene.”

Sosland said back in the early 2000s when she and Fried decided to collaborate, the first person she thought of interviewing was Judy Jacks Berman, director of Congregation Beth Shalom’s early childhood education center. At the time, Jacks Berman told her they didn’t have bullying; they taught kindness.

But times have changed. This year preschool teachers asked members of the Beth Shalom Sisterhood Banishing Bullying Behavior Project to conduct sessions for the preschool students and the staff to address the bullying behavior of their young students, Sosland said.

“The present political environment has contributed to a significant increase in bullying,” she said. “Research by the Southern Poverty Law Center during the (presidential) campaign found that 5,000 teachers responded to a survey as to the amount of increased bullying in their classrooms and increased fears of immigrant children. Children told their teachers they were afraid to leave home to come to school for fear that their parents would be picked up while they were at school.”

Sosland spent three years researching and writing this book and said she was amazed by the number of people, some in very prominent positions, who heard about it third-hand and asked to be connected with her so they could share their stories in order to spare others the pain they experienced.

Judge Howard Sachs, senior judge of the Western District of Missouri, provided her with material he had read and then passed on to her for the book.

“And then there’s Judge Howard A. Levine who received the highest honor in the state of New York that any judge can get. Why a man of his stature would take the time to read my textbooks I think speaks volumes,” she said. “Not only did he read the manuscript for this book, he even proofread it. In the acknowledgements you can see the really broad range of input in this book.”

She encourages readers to look over the acknowledgements in order to understand just how important so many people of various professional backgrounds found the message in her book.

For anonymity, she changed the names and places in the anecdotes. One person she interviewed had been bullied three times by three different bosses in 21 years. Sosland asked her why she stayed and the woman told her she felt her work was meaningful and that she was making a contribution to the community.

One of Sosland’s interviewees said he bullied because he felt that by inflicting pain on others he would alleviate his own pain.

Sosland said she interviewed dozens of lawyers, doctors and academicians and every one of them said bullying in their field was the worst. Three men, all published authors and businessmen who read Sosland and Fried’s textbooks, urged Sosland to write about workplace bullying.

In one of the anecdotes in her book, a young, single mother went to her doctor for medication and after several months the doctor told her she didn’t need more medicine; she needed to change her job, which she did.

“Eleven other people in her workplace left at the same time because of a bully, and it took the owners of the business six months to figure out what was going on,” Sosland said. “I found this doctor to have perceptive insight.”

Originally, the book was meant to be only about bullying in the workplace, but as she started to write it, she said she realized that about 50% of kids who bully in school are bullied at home by parents or siblings and that these parents go into the workplace, so they are not separate issues.

“That’s how I came to start with giving the context of early childhood and then into adulthood,” she said. “Thirty percent of the book is devoted to workplace bullying.”

Sosland said the goal is to work with children as well as adults, but the biggest hope is for children to see what they can do to stop bullying. All states are now required to have anti-bullying programs in the schools. She believes the most successful programs are the ones generated by students themselves.

“Early intervention is key and we stress this as soon as there are any signs because to me bullying is a call for help. That kid is hurting; you need to find out why and it needs to be effective, early intervention,” she said. “Kids are not born bullies; they may learn to bully because they are bullied. So if they learn to bully, they can also learn not to bully.”

Sosland also pointed out that 10-20% of senior citizens are being bullied. She gives an example in her book of an adult child being called by a social worker to intervene when it becomes apparent the child’s father is a bully in a senior residential setting.

The adult child said, “He bullied me all my life; you think I’m going to be able to change that now?”

Reviews of the book on Amazon give it five stars and an official OnlineBookClub.org review gives it four out of four stars, stating, “This book is intriguing and educative. It deals with an important subject and offers ways to solve a big problem in our society.”

“I’ve been very gratified by the reviews,” Sosland said. “I think people who have read the book have read it the way it was written and it was certainly worth the three years I devoted to it.”

“Banishing Bullying Behavior: A Call to Action” is available as a paperback through Amazon for $14.95.

Sosland, professor emerita of Park University, is a member of Congregation Beth Shalom.

A journalist recently challenged readers to take time out from the digital world in their personal lives for a month. What a silly proposition! One month would sink most Americans! Think of it; no social media, online news, video games or streaming.

Asking Jews to take time out is unnecessary. As people of faith, we have a built in safety valve to cope with too much internet and social media. We have the Sabbath. We don’t even have to assign a date to take time out; it’s rooted in our heritage. The Sabbath is a day to pause and let go of both the ordinary and demanding features of daily life. Though, the whirlwind of our days keeps us terrifically occupied. Many of us push the Sabbath aside, as a result, claiming to be “too busy.” Being too busy itself can cause us problems like burnout and sleepless nights. These problems may be solved with small successes for observing the Sabbath. 

Sabbath dinner at home is a special destination to end the week. The beauty of the Sabbath is experienced with closely cherished blessings, comfort food, joyous songs and sharing time with loved ones and friends. Yes, that does mean we have to decline last-minute invitations for fun activities on Friday night. Setting limits on ourselves can be tough; we must assert choices, nevertheless, and act on them.

Attending Sabbath services can be powerful. We resist the frenetic environment that surrounds us and carve a distinct space for ourselves. In the sanctuary, we have moments for silent reflection and personal peace. Equally, there exists a sense of belonging with all those present and Jews everywhere. Together we experience the extraordinary: we sing, we pray and we follow the sacred traditions of our faith. We are one people.

Each in our own way longs to interrupt the blur of days running together. By purposefully deciding what I will do and what I will not do, I choose to take back part of my life. This life includes a precious element, time. I remind myself that the present moment needs much attention. I was sitting in a waiting room recently just relaxing, seemingly doing nothing. More than one person looked up from a cellphone screen and eyed me suspiciously. I was out of sync with present-day life. As an online user I am caught, though, waiting for responses to messages, getting distracted and robbed of, you guessed it, time. We can only trust ourselves to stop, since grabbing our time, attention and worse are the deliberate aims of the digital world.

We recognize that spending time with family is important, yet we compromise against our better judgement. We decide that its acceptable to sit with each other but still be online. Too often, I see parents and children ignoring each other by staring at their screens in restaurants and waiting rooms. The problem can be solved so easily by sitting face to face and engaging with one another. Talking with and listening to each other build satisfying and supportive relationships. What parent doesn’t want that?

As leaders of our families, we want dearly to preserve meaningful relationships, and Jewish traditions and customs. When we follow through, we benefit and so do our loved ones. Remember, we Jews are the people who prize l’dor v’dor. What values of family life do we want to pass from our generation to the next generation? The choices we make matter because, make no mistake, they will likely be duplicated, good or bad, by our daughters, sons and grandchildren.

Mary Greenberg, Ph.D., serves on the State of Kansas Holocaust Commission. Her speaking engagements on preventing anti-Semitism, and the link between civil leadership and anti-Semitism are based on her research that advances the study of the Jewish people in the Diaspora.

I would like to have people think about how very small the world is and the Jewish world is even smaller.

Last Sunday evening (Aug. 11) was the end of Tisha b’Av and Debby and I were at K.I. to see the movie “The Long Way Home” (narrated by Morgan Freeman) that was shown before Havdalah and the end of the fast day.

This movie was about the survivors from the death camps and their trials and tribulations and how they, despite horrific circumstances, made it through the ordeal.

It was quite a moving movie and there were Kleenex tissues frequently used due to the topic and the actual footage shown.

Part of the movie was the footage from the famous Exodus 1947 ship and showed the damage the British inflicted upon the vessel with its unarmed human cargo.

Now, here is the uncanny part.

I was wishing my Israeli alarm supplier a Shavua Tov (good week) as I frequently do (I have asked “How many of your customers wish you a Shavua Tov?” And his response is “Joe you are the ONLY one”) and informed him about the movie I had just seen about what occurred to the camp survivors and how they made it from the death camps to the displaced persons camps and eventually FREEDOM.

I was stunned when he then told me his parents were on board that very vessel and despite having hand-to-hand combat with the British soldiers through the night, they were forced to return back to Germany.

Despite the odds, eventually they made it to Israel and helped to build the state of Israel.

His company is now one of the leading wireless technology security data companies in the world!

Am Yisroel Chai!!

Joe Pfefer

Overland Park, Kansas

Did you know there are ways to make positive change in this world each time you go to the store? I’ve recently learned about a website and app called Goods Unite Us (goodsuniteus.com), which takes a look at campaign donations from major corporations and their executives. It has started to change the way I look at my own consumerism and how my dollars, while not as plentiful as those of international corporations, can make a difference.

I’ve learned that some of the money I spend on products I enjoy is in turn donated to politicians whose political views don’t align with mine. The hours and hours of research that contributors poured into this database have resulted in a few easy-to-understand statistics:

1) The breakdown of Republican vs. Democratic politicians a specific company supports (as a percentage of the whole);

2) The top five politicians they support;

3) On a scale of low-medium-high, how much this company supports campaign finance reform by not getting involved in politics;

4) What percentage of donations comes from the corporation itself compared to the corporation’s senior employees.

Like any quality database, you can sort the information in a myriad of ways. Are you interested in how local companies like Hallmark, AMC Theaters or Sprint use their “free speech” (aka dollars)? Looking to find out which companies donate to Sharice Davids, Pat Roberts or Jerry Moran? What about the plethora of candidates in the Democratic primary? You can look by company, politician or sector. The sector feature is helpful when trying to find alternatives should you decide to change your shopping habits.

I’m working on it, but it’s not easy. It’s hard to break a Diet Coke habit, even though I see that Coca Cola and its executives spend a lot of money influencing politics. But I can also feel good when I see that my Green Bay Packers do not contribute to politicians or PACs with significant funds. It’s a difficult goal to strive for 100% political agreement when shopping, but I am trying to be more methodical about where my money goes.

In the Reform movement, we often say that we make choices through knowledge — this typically means understanding halachah (Jewish law) and deciding for ourselves how to incorporate it into our lives. Here is another way we can take advantage of the immense amount of knowledge available to us today and use it in ways that support an America we can believe in.

Rabbi Kleinman is director of Lifelong Learning at Congregation Beth Torah.

Kansas Interfaith Action (KIFA) condemned the Trump administration on Tuesday for its new policy for “Inadmissibility on Public Charge Grounds” as inhumane and unjust. 

Rabbi Moti Rieber, executive director of KIFA, said, “Immigrants are part of the fabric of our communities. To single them out in this way is a direct contravention of the Scriptural command to ‘treat the immigrant the same as a native-born citizen.’ ”

The new “public charge” policy, which appeared Monday on the Federal Register’s website, was proposed months ago for public comment and the comments were overwhelmingly in opposition. Nonetheless, the Trump administration has moved forward with the proposal as part of its anti-immigrant program.

Under current policy, a public charge is defined as an immigrant who is “likely to become primarily dependent on the government for subsistence.” The proposed rule radically expands the definition to include any immigrant who simply “receives one or more public benefits,” including services to which they are legally entitled, such as nutrition, health care or housing.

This shift drastically increases the scope of who can be considered a public charge to include not just people who receive benefits as the main source of support, but also people who use basic-needs programs to supplement their earnings from low-wage work. (Kansas Action for Children)

KIFA sees this policy change as part of the Trump administration’s assault on immigrants of all kinds. From drastically cutting the number of refugees accepted into the United States, to criminalization of asylum seekers at the southern border, and now this attack on legal immigrants, the administration is seeking to harass, limit and force out immigrants of all kinds.

“People of faith from across the spectrum oppose the administration’s policy attacks on immigrants,” said Rabbi Rieber. “Care and concern for the immigrant is a core faith value. The administration’s actions are an affront to morality, as well as to the U.S. ethos of ‘Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,’ as emblazoned on the Statue of Liberty.”

Kansas Interfaith Action invites congregations and individuals wishing to “welcome the immigrant’’ to join with the organization to help register and encourage people to vote, advocate just immigration policies and stand with immigrants in their communities.

This Saturday evening and Sunday, we observe a moment of historic sadness and modern significance. The “holiday” is called Tisha b’Av. According to tradition, it is a time of communal mourning. We fast. We do not bathe or wear new clothes. We sit on stools or the floor and we recite passages from the biblical book of Lamentations (in Hebrew: Eicha).

As a community, we will do this on Saturday, Aug. 10, at Congregation Beth Shalom. At 9:45 p.m., there will be a brief Tisha b’Av evening (Ma’ariv) service. It will be followed by a d’var Torah and the reciting of Eicha.

Our communal observance continues on Sunday, Aug. 11, at Kehilath Israel Synagogue. The movie, “The Long Way Home” will be shown at 5 p.m. followed by a panel discussion with rabbis. A Mincha (afternoon) service and brief Torah lesson will follow at 8 p.m. After a brief Ma’ariv service, we will conclude our fast at 8:51 p.m. with a light break fast.

That is what we will do to observe this moment as a community. We hope you will be with us.

However, it begs a question: Why should we care and how does it apply to us today?

Tisha B’Av is about loss. It commemorates the destruction of the First Temple in Jerusalem in 586 BCE by the Babylonians, and the destruction of the Second Temple in 70 CE by the Romans. In addition, people of hate chose that same day throughout history to destroy Jews. In 1096, the First Crusade began. In 1492, the Jews were expelled from Spain. In 1942, mass deportations to the Treblinka death camp began on Tisha b’Av. And there are a dozen other Tisha b’Av anniversaries we recognize.

For Jews, the destruction of both Temples were moments of complete loss. Especially with the Second Temple, it represented who we were, how we prayed ... it was the fulfillment of almost 2,000 years of historical development. We need only to read the Torah — the book of Exodus and the construction of the Tabernacle — to know that the Temple was central to our identity.

And those stones in the picture at the top of this article? Those are the actual stones of the Second Temple. This is the actual street that ran along the length of the Temple’s retaining wall. And the broken pavement and indented stones? That is the result of the Romans’ burning the Temple and the walls — literally — came crashing down upon this street.

Our home was destroyed.

That is why it matters. It matters because it changed who we were to become. It matters because something was taken away from us. It matters because your ancestors and mine (either biological or spiritual) were taken away in chains as slaves. It matters because other family ancestors weren’t so lucky. Many, many died. Because of hatred and prejudice and triumphalism.

And today? That same hatred and prejudice and evil persists. We saw the results of it in El Paso. We saw the results in Charlottesville. We saw the results in Charleston and Pittsburgh. We saw the results in Kansas City at the Jewish Community Campus and Village Shalom. And on and on and on ...

Yes, it is time to talk about guns. But that is not what Tisha b’Av is about. It is a time to mourn and to remember what evil causes. Such evil happens because of demonic speech. It happens because people teach their children to hate, to be racist. It happens because (with our First Amendment rights) anyone can spew hatred that others can read and — because of the world of the internet and social media — it is magnified and glorified and intensified. And the results are the senseless deaths that have happened within our world.

And it is just by chance that it wasn’t the Jews ... this time.

So, yes, Tisha b’Av matters.

It is a moment to remember what happens when hate wins. It is a moment to remember those whose names have been forgotten to history ... and those whose names are fresh in our minds ... who have died because they were simply “other.”

It is a time to remember. It is a time to mourn. It is a time to resolve that Tisha b’Av will be — someday — a historic memory only. That day, though, will only come when each of us stands up and refuses to permit hate speech, racism, divisiveness — regardless of from whose mouth it is uttered — and condemns it loudly and righteously. Only when we recognize that the “other” is our brother and sister ... and not to be demonized ... only when we stand up and protect each human being from being belittled, denigrated, denied their humanity ... only then will we have learned the lesson of Tisha b’Av.

Until then ... let us mourn and let us remember.

Rabbi Arthur Nemitoff is senior rabbi at The Temple, Congregation B’nai Jehudah. This article originally appeared in the congregation’s Bisseleh Bytes e-blast.