QUESTION: Can you tell me something about why, generally speaking, Jews do not name their children after their living relatives?
ANSWER: This is a complicated but very interesting subject. It has been a tradition for many years in the Ashkenazic world or Western Europeans Jewish world to name our children after deceased members of our family. One does not have to do so. However, it has been traditional not to name after the living. By the way, Sephardic Jews have never had that tradition. The only thing that the Talmud actually dictates regarding naming of a child is that one should not name one’s children after sinners or evil doers. Just to further strengthen this opinion, the rabbis go on to say “any person named after someone infamous or wicked will not be successful.” I do not know anybody who would want to name anyone after someone wicked or an evil doer anyway!
The uniqueness of these views is that one is introducing an element of mysticism and fear into the ordinary functioning of naming a child.
In Europe the custom developed, as I mentioned above, to refrain from naming children with the names of living persons. There are several reasons given.
According to Jewish law it is not deemed proper respect to call one’s own parent by his or her first name. That is actually Jewish law. I have always felt that parents who let their children call them by their first names are just asking for problems further on in life. Giving a child the name of a living parent or grandparent would generate confusion and limit respect given to parents. There is also a superstitious ingredient in this as well. To name a child after a living person gives the impression that one wishes that they are no longer alive. Let me explain. When a child together with his or her father or grandfather or grandmother have the same name and the time comes for them to “pass on,” we want to make sure that the older rather than the younger is the one who goes. I know that sounds silly, but that is a superstition also attached to this tradition.
Therefore, to forestall all such issues, Western European Jews, which includes most of us, simply did not name children after a living person. Concern for proper respect for parents, mysticism, coupled with the fear of “evil eye” serve as a basis for this tradition. There has never been an actual law to outlaw naming a child after a living person. However, tradition is very strong not to do so. It is a custom, but it has prevailed for well over a thousand years.
